Invader Zim: Home Away From Home
by CmndrPenguin
Summary: Zim and gang are in hi skool now. Zim is trying to live a normal life, giving up his mission to conquer the humans. When a new student arrives in town, he strangely feels compelled to speak with her, and Dib doesn't like it. R&R?
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Alright, picture this. An Invader Zim story that doesn't quite follow the show. Keep up with me people. Taking total creative leeway here, making it my own. I see a bunch of stories where Zim finds out his mission was a lie, but in here he doesn't. I take a lot of liberties with this. And Rik's name is pronounced like Rick. I hope you like it!**

Chapter One:

The cruiser skidded to a stop, just short of some trees and shrubs. Despite the slight bumps and bruises from the abrupt halt, she felt fine. Great, even. The signal was coming from close by, she could hear her scanners going berserk in the dashboard of her vessel. Unfortunately, she would have to leave her tracking device behind along with her ship, hoping nobody would happen to stumble upon it in its hiding spot. After hastily throwing some branches around the cruiser, she climbed up a small rock structure and looked out over the town. "Hm. Not a very big town is it?" she asked of no one in particular. A grin crossed her face. "Maybe you'll be easier to find."

* * *

><p>Zim awoke to an unknown sound. It was horrible, loud, obnoxious, and most likely coming from two feet away from him. Still groggy from his unexpected nap, he looked around his living room for Gir. When the robot was nowhere to be found, Zim reluctantly wandered into the kitchen. "Gir?" his voice cracked. "Gir! Where are you?" After a few moments of half-heartedly searching, he gave p and sat at the kitchen table, where he was suddenly greeted by a large silver platter with an equally large silver cover. "Gir? Did you try to cook yourself again? I told you. You're not very tasty…" Zim trailed off as he lifted the cover.<p>

Atop the platter, sat an enormous stack of dry waffles and a side of toast. A small card was placed on the toast. It read : "HI SKOOL!" Zim was washed with a feeling of appreciation. He stashed a few of the waffles in his backpack so that Gir's intentions weren't wasted. He glanced at the clock he had placed next to the refrigerator. He had a little more than an hour before his first day of school. He was a senior this year, and he regretted it. He had been wasting his precious time on Earth, sent many years ago to conquer it. He failed time and time again, due to his sworn enemy, the big headed Dib.

Zim sighed and laced up his boots, glancing around at his failed experiments now used as entertainment for Gir. It was all broken now, as was expected from his inept robot. He sighed again as he inserted his human contacts, making his natural red eyes look like blue human ones. As much as it pained him to admit it, he grew quite accustomed to Earthly ways and long abandoned his original mission.

The walk to school was a quiet, uneventful one, as he did not run into Dib, who had made a habit of following Zim around since grade school to foil all of Zim's plans. It amused Zim that Dib had not figured out that he was no longer trying to invade the planet. He reached homeroom before the rest of the class, as usual. Instead of taking a seat in the front, he trekked to the back row and threw his bag on the desk as a pillow. He heard the other students file in over the next few minutes, predictably avoiding the seats around him. He propped his head up on his arm, watching the students interact with one another. He was slightly jealous. The entire time he spent on Earth, he never gained a friend. He wondered why nobody wanted to be friends with the all powerful Zim, Irken Invader as a child. He learned since then that the only way to have friends on this planet was to conform to their ways, which he refused to do. Although he may not be planning to take over, he certainly was not going to assimilate himself into this culture.

As the last bell rang, their new homeroom teacher strode into the classroom. He was a tall, lanky man with bright red hair. Unlike the rest of the teachers he's had, this one was young, appearing barely out of college or perhaps still enrolled. He slammed himself into his chair and swiveled, staring at the class menacingly. "My name is Mr. C." He continued staring.

The students shuffled uncomfortably and began whispering amongst themselves. A girl sitting near Zim was giggling about how cute Mr. C. was to one of her friends. He rolled his eyes and turned to the creaking door out of reflex. Once it was fully opened, a teenage girl entered the room. She had astonishing pink hair with black bangs that she wore in pigtails and bright, oddly purple colored eyes. Zim, along with the other boys in the class, couldn't look away from her. Unlike the other boys, Zim did not think she was "hot," as was the human term. Although she was attractive, Zim merely stared because something about her seemed unnatural.

Mr. C. swiveled sharply towards the new comer and narrowed his eyes. "What do you want?" He asked, tapping steel toed boots on the desk.

The girl thrust a paper into his hands. Without waiting for any prompt she stated, "My name's Rik!" Some of the boys mumbled, "Hi, Rik…" Mr. C. grunted as he handed the paper back and pointed at the only seat available in the classroom. Rik skipped to the desk next to Dib.

* * *

><p>Dib couldn't believe his luck. Not only did he sit next to the prettiest girl in homeroom, he had a class with her. A science class. He couldn't help but grin to himself as she took the seat next to him yet again, knowing he'd get a chance to show off. She returned his grin with a small, yet extremely warm smile. Dib could feel his heart melt. "So… uh, science. Cool, huh?" Rik giggled and turned towards the blackboard at the front of the class. He smacked himself with his text book.<em> "Stupid! What a great first thing to say to someone! Why have an enormous brain if you're not going to use it? Think, moron! THINK!"<em>

He spent all of class thinking of a way to talk to Rik. He needed to sound cool, suave and less Dib-like. He was in the middle of his imaginary first date with her when Mrs. Adams called his name. "Dib, honey… We're in science class here. You need to pay attention. I'm sure you're father wouldn't approve of this." She clucked, shaking her head in dismay. Again, Dib's forehead met with the text book.

"If you have trouble in science, I could help you." Dib turned to his right and locked eyes with Rik, she had an impish look on her face.

"I don't know how to say this…" Dib started, feeling his face blush slightly. He stopped. She was offering to tutor him. Not the way he imagined, but he'd take it. "Yeah. I have a lot of problems in science. Never really been good at it." He chuckled. Her smile grew. "I didn't realize you had an accent."

"Hm? Yeah. Australian." Rik answered, rolling her eyes. "Don't want to talk about it. So, how about we meet at lunch and we'll set up study dates?" Dib's face turned a darker red at the word "dates." He nodded in response.

"_Oh yeah. That conversation went way better. Good job, Dib."_

* * *

><p>Zim tapped his pencil in an annoyed fashion. Halfway through English class, Mr. Wright shouted, "Zim! Knock of that irritating racket!" Zim looked up from his desk to find the entire class glaring at him and the teacher with his arms across his jelly-like belly.<p>

Zim looked around at their faces before replying quietly, "Victory for Zim." He slouched in his chair, crossed his arms and threw his legs over the desk. Mr. Wright didn't seem to mind as long as he wasn't tapping a pencil.

Throughout the rest of class, the students took turns reading Romeo and Juliet in it's original play form. It almost seemed intentional that Zim be excluded, but he didn't care. He had already read the play years before hand out of boredom. The second the bell rang for lunch, Zim bolted out the door. He didn't know why, but he had to find Rik. He had to talk to her. Immediately after leaving the A building, he ran into fluffy pink thing. "You're in Zim's way!" He shouted instinctively.

"Well, maybe you're in _my_ way." Rik yelled back, crossing her arms huffily. Zim couldn't help but notice her full chest.

He shook his head and replied, "I'm sorry. I did not see you there." Rik cheered right up and shot him a smile. Now was his chance to talk. "Would you care to join me for lunch?" She grinned again and took his arm.

* * *

><p>Dib walked into the cafeteria, looking for Rik. He was shocked to see her sitting with his nemesis, Zim. What's worse, they were laughing. Genuinely laughing. She sat close to him and appeared to be actually enjoying his company. Angry and confused, Dib marched over to their table and slammed his hands upon it. "Hello, Zim." He spat.<p>

"Dib." Zim replied.

"Hey, Dib. What's up?" Rik asked cheerfully.

"Well, I just stopped by to set up that date." He lowered himself onto the bench and leaned on his elbow. _"Nice."_

"Well, I was thinking we could meet at your house." Rik replied.

"No." Dib said curtly. "Not my house. Uh… my sister is such a distraction."

Zim laughed. "Oh yeah. Big time."

Dib glared at him. "How about yours?"

"Hm. Parents are hippies. We won't be able to concentrate." Rik stated. "Library? Say, five o'clock?"

"See you there."


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two:

Dib awaited eagerly outside the library after school, frantically searching for Rik. He wanted, no, he needed to find out why Zim was talking to her at lunch. He had to know if Zim was planning on stealing her brain or something for alien experiments. "Nothing will happen to your brain on my watch." Dib said aloud, causing many passerby to stop and stare for a moment.

"Look, Mommy! A crazy boy!" A little girl shouted, tugging on the hem of her mother's dress. The mother shook her head sadly at Dib and ushered her child far away from him.

"No! Wait! I'm not crazy!" Dib exclaimed, feeling the need to explain himself. "I'm just trying to save an innocent girl from falling into the evil crutches of our enemies! It's Zim! Zim has horrible, no! He has DEVASTATING plans for ALL OF MANKIND!"

"I don't know about all that." Rik's voice said from behind him. Dib turned, embarrassed that she saw his outburst. "He seems like a nice guy to me. You ready to start studying?" She grinned and bounced into the library. Feeling his face turn bright red, Dib followed.

* * *

><p>Gir sat on the living room floor, vigorously trying to get every last bit of his chocolate chip supreme chunk milkshake from the new Meats 'R Us burger joint down the block. His eyes followed his master as he paced the room, ranting about something or another. "I don't understand it, Gir! It's driving me insane!" Zim exclaimed after who knows how long, slamming his head on the couch in defeat.<p>

"Awww…." Gir abandoned his milkshake and gave Zim a hug. "It's okay. I'm afraid of the dark, too. Something keeps making a big, scary, bumping noise." He wimpered.

"I'm not afraid of the fucking dark, Gir." Zim said, aggravated that not even his robot servant paid attention to what he had to say. He sighed and wandered down to his lab, absentmindedly tinkering with an old invention. He didn't even remember what it did.

"Master?" Gir said in a tiny voice. He sounded sad, but every other sentence out of his mouth sounded that way. Zim grunted in response. "Master? Are you angry with me?"

Zim continued tinkering while he thought. Sighing again, he replied, "No, Gir. I am not angry with you. I… I'm having trouble understanding something. Something about the humans. I'm just aggravated and what the hell is this thing supposed to do?" He asked, throwing his wrench at the thingy.

"That's the hypersonic boost for the old cruiser, Master." Gir answered. "It goes, 'PSHOOOM!' and goes really fast!" He shrieked and ran in circles. Zim couldn't help but smile a little. As unhelpful as the robot may seem, he had his moments.

"Come, Gir." Zim ordered, making his servant stop mid-circle. "Let's go get something to eat." Again, the robot shrieked and ran up the stairs to put on his dog suit. It was his old disguise, but Gir refused to throw it away and insisted on using it. Zim agreed, but only because he knew the humans were too stupid to ever realize that they were not from this planet, let alone this solar system. Gir was already out the door when Zim spotted the abandoned cup in the middle of the living room. "Gir! Clean up your mess first."

"But… but I'm not done with it!"

"We're not going to Chicken Hut until this is cleaned up."

"But-but…" The robot burst into tears. "I'M STILL DRINKING IT! I'M NOT DONE I'M NOT DONE I'M NOT DONE!"

"Gir!" Zim shouted over him. "We'll get you a new one. But you have to throw that one away. Now. Do it or you're not going out to eat." After several moments of an internal battle, Gir obeyed.

* * *

><p>"Thanks for walking me home, Dib." Rik said as they approached the door. She lived in a white house with blue shutters over the windows and a blue door. The garage was open and inside was a single vehicle, a Volkswagen Bug. "I'll see you at school tomorrow."<p>

"Huh? Oh, yeah." Dib was too lost in thought thinking of a way to invite himself in to hear what she was saying. He realized only when she waved and shut the door. "Good night…" he muttered. He turned and slowly walked down her perfect lawn and unexpectedly ran into his little sister. "Gaz? What are you doing here?"

"I followed you." She shrugged, as if nothing were wrong with spying on her brother. "You like her, don't you? Do yourself a favor. Don't ask her out."

"What? Why are you telling me this?"

"She just shut the door in your face, shit-for-brains. She doesn't like you." Gaz started walking away.

"You don't know that!" Gaz said nothing, just continued walking, leaving him behind. "Fuck you, Gaz!" He yelled as he ran to catch up.

The moment they stepped foot in their home, Gaz was sucked into "Goddess of War" on her Game Slave. Nonetheless, Dib continued to talk to her. "Please, Gaz! I'm asking you for help! I like this girl, yes. But I think she likes Zim! I need help! I can't let Zim get his green alien claws on her!"

"You want help? Stop being you. That would be an instant improvement." Gaz shot, not looking up from her video game.

Dib dropped his head and his heart sank. "Please, Gaz. I'm begging you."

Gaz finally looked at him and sighed. "Okay. I'll help you."

* * *

><p>The next morning, Dib stood in front of Gaz's full length mirror, examining his new outfit that he and his sister put together the previous evening. He switched his tired unsmiley face t-shirt for a dark blue long sleeve underneath an unbottoned black Dickies' work shirt. He wore baggy black pants and black Adio shoes. Despite Gaz's constant complaints, he refused to style his hair differently. "Alright. Let's do this." He said to his reflection.<p>

He and Gaz walked to school in silence. Gaz was absorbed into her game yet again and Dib was lost in his thoughts. He was once again thinking of a way to ask Rik out on a date. He wished there was a school event coming up soon, that would make it a lot easier on him. And there wasn't any good movies playing in the theatre. "Hey, Gaz. One more thing… what am I supposed to say?"

Gaz grunted as she looked up from the game. "I don't know, nor do I care. Now leave me to my game. I'm getting stomped by these little demon spawn bastards." Dib sighed, thinking himself hopeless.

It was lunch by the time Dib got the courage to speak to Rik. She arrived in class before he did, so he was able to stall until there were no seats available next to her. He felt like an idiot, dodging her like this. This just wasn't him. He was never afraid to speak his mind, yet the thought of talking to her made him want to vomit. _"Oh, great. I think I really am gonna puke…" _he thought to himself as he made his way through the crowds. She was sitting alone in the corner of the cafeteria. It appeared as though she were doing research, she didn't look up from her laptop as he approached. "Hey." He muttered.

Rik snapped up quickly, her eyes widened with surprise. "Dib! Hi! Didn't see you." She closed her computer and stashed it away in her messenger bag. "Nice threads." She winked.

"Uh, thanks." Dib shuffled the toe of his shoe. "I wanted to say thanks for offering to help me study. I also wanted to ask if you were-"

"FOOD FIGHT!"

A nanosecond after it was declared, a smorgasbord was sent flying in all directions. A very hot slice of school pizza smacked Dib in the back of his head. "OW! FUCK! WHO FUCKING THREW THAT!" The question was pointless, as the students were more interested in throwing their lunches rather than talk. Angrily, Dib snatched a handful of mashed potatoes from a nearby lunch tray and hurled it in the direction the pizza came from. Rik laughed before throwing chunks of her half eaten hoagie at random kids. Someone threw a large piece of lasagna, which seemed to deflect off Rik's wrists without leaving a mess. Before he could ask any questions, Dib's head was bombarded with snow peas and there was a loud whistle.

The students froze mid-toss, the intended weapons falling to the floor, and stared up at the man standing on the stage. "What is going on here?" The stout man asked.

"These FILTHY hooligans have de-evolved into cavemen and throwing food like barbarians!" Zim's voice was heard from the back of the cafeteria. Dib snapped his head toward him; Zim looked as if he had just won an award. Or a bloody battle, as is more relative to the preceding events.

"Nobody leaves this room until THE FLOOR SHINES LIKE THAT BOY'S ENORMOUS HEAD!" shouted the principal, pointing at Dib.

"My head's not big!" Dib shouted back. Everyone glared at him and resentfully started cleaning. "My head's not big…" He whined, looking to Rik for comfort. She was smirking, trying as little as possible to help clean the mess. He shook his head. Instead of looking for sympathy, he should be asking for a date. "So. Back to what I was saying… What are you doing Friday?"

* * *

><p>Zim sat behind Dib in Calculus. Right behind him. At the beginning of class, he pulled a feather out of his bag. He didn't know how it got there in the first place, but that didn't mean he couldn't use it to torture Dib. While the human was taking down notes, Zim gently tickled his ear. Dib instinctively reached up to his ear. Zim kept this up until Dib smacked his head and yelled. "Do we have a problem, Mr. Membrane?"<p>

"Mr. Membrane is my father." Dib replied. "And my problem is Zim."

"LIES!" Zim almost shouted. "Mr. Mathews, I am nothing but a quiet, _normal_ student just trying to get an education and I find this Dib creature to be quite the disturbance."

Mr. Mathews shook his head and sighed. "Another disturbance from you and it's the front of the class for you." Zim laughed. "That goes for both of you." Dib laughed. Mr. Mathews continued the lesson, ignoring the two.

"What exactly do you gain by this, Zim?"

"By what? Embarrassing you in class or embarrassing you in front of Rik?"

"In front of… you caused the food fight!" Zim grinned. "You threw that pizza at my head! That was hot, you ass hole!"

"The sad part is, I didn't even have to aim." Zim said with a fake sad voice. "That's how big your head is, Dib. I don't even have to _try_ to hit it. Because your head is very large. A blindfolded monkey could hit your head with pizza."

"I get it!" Dib interrupted. "You and everyone else in the world thinks I have a big head. I've heard it my entire life, it's old news. Can we move on now? Why are you trying to embarrass me in front of Rik?"

Zim chuckled. "Well, it's not like I have to try very hard at that either. Do you even own a mirror? That outfit alone makes you look like a fool."

"Do you like her?"

"I would never date a human."

"Then why even bother trying to get in my way?"

An evil grin spread across Zim's face. "I just like to make your life hell."

"You're a dick." Dib shot. He turned back to the front of the classroom.

* * *

><p>"Hey, Dib! Wait up!" Rik called, shoving her way through the mass of mangled students. Last bell rang and everyone was fighting out of the doors. Dib paused, causing him to be thrown into some lockers and students pushed past. "I just wanted to give you this. Talk to you later!" She was lost in the sea of bodies.<p>

"What was that?" Gaz asked, suddenly appearing at his side. Dib unfolded the paper Rik handed him. It had a series of numbers scrawled hastily across it. "Wow. You actually got her number. I had my doubts."

Dib laughed victoriously. "Take that, Zim! Despite your efforts at foiling my plans, I have prevailed!" Gaz grunted and dragged him out the doors.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three:

"You should have seen his face when he figured out that I was the one that threw the pizza at his head, Gir!" Zim laughed as he and his robotic "dog" walked through the town shopping center.

"Whee-hee! Flying food!" Gir squealed and ran circles around Zim as they passed the old library. He suddenly stopped and glared through the large display window at the musty bookshelves, the eyes of his costume slightly glowing red as his LED eyes changed color. "Master- I'm picking up threatening signals. Somebody wants to destroy this planet."

Zim peered through the window as Gir spoke. The lights were dim, he couldn't imagine anybody wanting to enter the building, yet he felt compelled to investigate. "If anybody is going to destroy this disgusting planet, it will be Zim." He muttered, mostly to himself, as he swung the door open.

The library smelled of mildew and dust, as if nobody had once taken a rag to any surface in the many years it had been open. Zim hadn't even seen anybody in this library since Gir's attack on it long ago. "I don't think there's anybody here, Gir." Zim stated as he passed through a few shelves. The words barely left his mouth when he heard the faint fluttering of pages and the clicking of somebody typing. He looked down at his robot, who had suddenly ducked behind him and whimpered as if scared. "Oh, come on. Quit being such a baby."

They ventured to the back of the abandoned library, following the occasional shutting of a book or typing. Finally, Zim saw in the very back corner, barely visible due to the failing light, the bright pink fluff that was the newest bane of his existence. He cleared his throat to announce his presence, Rik didn't respond. "What are you working on?" He asked, leaning over her shoulder.

"Oh, well, you know, stuff." She replied as she turned towards him, their faces only a few inches apart. Zim hadn't ever been this close to a human before; he realized just why all the boys at school had been fawning over her. He noticed that her already abnormal eyes had flecks of gold and silver in them, giving them a beautiful yet eerie glowing effect. They gave him the impression that she was hiding something.

He glanced at her computer screen, filled with web pages of Earth's history and scientific looking sites. "Doing a history project for school?"

"I guess you can say that." She replied, a small smirk crossed her face.

Zim stood straight and narrowed his eyes as he studied her expression. "What do you mean?"

Rik closed her computer and motioned for him to sit. "I think you know what I mean." She replied.

"No. No, I really don't."

"Wow. And here I thought that after all this time, you would appreciate my help taking over this pathetic excuse for a planet."

Zim froze while his brain processed what she was saying. "Are… are you Irken?"

"Good boy!" Rik exclaimed, clapping her hands. "Speaking of 'good boys,' where is your SIR unit?"

Zim paused, he had completely forgotten about Gir, hadn't even noticed how quiet it was until Rik mentioned it. "Gir?" A low rumble sounded throughout the library, shaking books to the ground and knocking shelves over. Suddenly, the shelf right behind their table shattered into a million little splinters as Gir came shuttling through the air, squealing in utter delight. "Gir!"

The robot returned to the floor in front of Zim. "Yes, master?"

"Let's go home." He turned to Rik, she had hastily packed up her laptop and a few large books. "I guess I'll see you at school." He left before she had the chance to invite herself over.

* * *

><p>Zim arrived at school the next morning to find Rik waiting for him patiently atop his usual seat, not budging even as he sat down. "Can I help you?"<p>

"I'm here to help you, remember?"

"I don't recall the Tallest ever assigning two invaders to the same planet. Ever." Zim said, pushing her gently off his desk. She put her hand down and leaned towards him, so close he could smell the sweet scent of her perfume. "Besides, I don't need help."

"I'm so sure." She scoffed. Zim noticed the other students filing in as the bell rang and turned his attention away from Rik. She huffed before slamming herself down into the seat next to him.

"Well, class, seeing as how today is standardized testing day for sophomores, there will be a change in scheduling today." Mr. C droned on as he swiveled his chair slowly in front of class, giving each student an icy glare. "Since it is a half day for all other grades, I get the joy of being the only teacher you'll see today."

Dib tuned Mr. C out and glanced to the back of the classroom. He saw Rik and Zim passing a note back and forth. _"She's passing notes to him in class? Shit. I gotta do something before he steals my girl!"_ He shot his hand into the air. "Mr. C! I'm sorry, but I can't seem to concentrate on what you're saying over the sound of paper crumpling in the back of class!"

Mr. C slowly rose from his chair, towering over the students. His face was stern and unpleasant. "There are two things I do not tolerate in my class." He growled. "Interruptions and tattle tales." Mr. C turned towards Dib. "One more outburst from you, Membrane, and it's detention for you. Understand?"

"But-"

"So glad we see eye to eye." The teacher said as he returned to his desk and continued his lecture.

* * *

><p>School could not end fast enough in Dib's opinion. As the bell rang, he rushed to catch Rik before she left. "Hey, Rik! Got a moment?" She turned as he approached. "I was uh, wondering if we were still on for Friday?"<p>

"Oh, right! We had plans, didn't we?" Rik replied, smacking her forehead with the heel of her hand. Dib's stomach dropped, he knew she was going to bail on him. He was shocked when she smiled and said, "Of course."


End file.
